Today was pretty dicey. On the plus side, I had great energy this morning and in the afternoon. I haven't felt achy either. On the negative side, I couldn't do anything with my energy because I had to be close to the bathroom. I don't know why, but post-SWF "cleansing" took forever today. There were nearly four hours where I felt like I couldn't leave the house just in case. So that was a real bummer since I felt so good.
Early evening I went to the mall with a friend and was gone about two hours. By the time I got back I was in dire need of some limeade, and I felt cranky and sort of emotional/frustrated. Two separate opportunities to go out to dinner, and I had to miss it. For what? To sit and read in my room? Lame and boring.
Back to the pluses though, today marks the halfway point. I was being kind of pitiful to my parents when they got back from dinner, and they confided that they thought I'd only last two days, so they were already impressed. That's the kind of thing that motivates though-- people thinking you can't do something.
I know I'll absolutely make it 10 days; I wouldn't have started a blog if I thought I'd fail. At this point I'm hoping I feel like I actually can stop at 10 days. I mean that in two ways. a) I've read about what you're supposed to expel from your body while on the Cleanse, and I very much want that to happen. It's one of the primary reasons I'm doing this. So if my body needs more than 10 days to do it, then I will continue to do this for more than 10 days. Although I can't foresee 20. That would be bonkers for me. And, b) I don't want to stop this before I feel like I truly have a grip on how I want to proceed. It's almost silly how much easier it is to have self-control when you have such restriction. People keep telling me they could "never" do this, but to me this is waaaaaay easier than figuring out how to 1) avoid processed food 2) eat smaller portions 3) avoid too much caffeine, sugar, alcohol, meat, dairy, etc . Thinking about post-cleanse is scary because I don't wanna fuck it up. Doing this is a big step in the right direction toward better health, and I don't want to back peddle. Tonight I was around both beer and pizza, and of course I wanted both. Everyone else was having both. In two weeks when I'm not doing this anymore, handling those types of situations will be more difficult than it was tonight. And tonight it was difficult.
The best thing I can do is keep reading books and articles that reaffirm what I'm doing, and keep myself motivated. I've certainly never felt this motivated before.
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This is so awesome, Danielle. Really well written! I have seriously thought about doing this at times, and you know what my number one reason would be? It would be to not have to decide what to make for dinner for a week and a half. That would be brilliant. Though I'd probably cave after a day, still, I think about it from time to time. I will seriously spend like, an hour and a half trying to think of what I'm hungry for and then forget I'm hungry and it's 10PM and then I make a sandwich.
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